As some of us might have experienced, learned and observed thus far, there are many different styles of "love".
There is shallow love. Shallow love is not the same as superficial love, however. There is obsessive love. Obsessive love is not the same as deep love, either. There is distant love, there is irrational love, there is unrequited love. There is forbidden love. There is destructive love, crazy love, lost love, traditional, innocent and pure love.
And then there is safe love. Love of the cautionary kind.
What is it about love that it is able to exist with universal understanding while maintaining so many facets simultaneously? Despite the method of love, one thing can be agreed and rarely argued: that when love is there, regardless of the style, it holds within it the weight of the world. Perhaps this is why after experiencing enough heartbreaks, cautionary love is born.
Cautionary/safe love is tough to criticize. Afterall, it uses rational thought, logic, and objectiveness to come to its conclusions. Thus, the scientist. But even scientists practiced alchemy. One must wonder what love can be if it is completely mapped out and orchestrated with a detailed agenda. Furthermore, how can we predict the future? Would we want to? Is our need for control and certainty worth potentially sacrificing a happiness that, having never experienced it, we were unable to anticipate during our calculations of what a proper love should be in this life?
No risk, no reward. No guts, no glory. It has been said that outside your comfort zone is where the magic happens. Love in and of itself is a magical world of mystery and emotion. A sparkling carnival of unknowns. It is all left to the imagination. But when fear reigns, where can these fantasies take us? Our emotions influence our fate. Love has the power to destroy us or save us, and that is a frightening thing. One must ask oneself if they feel the gamble is worth it.
For myself, if I had a million dollars to put on a one-shot spin on the roulette of love, I would take it. Perhaps that is because I know what I have to give, and I believe there are others like me. And if they are willing to place the same bet on me, how could I live my life wondering what would have happened had I not took a chance on them. Gambling is dangerous, and jackpots are few. But when the jackpot is true happiness for the rest of our short days in this life, how could I turn my back on that? The alternative is to spend the remainder of my days in regret and in imitation of something I wanted that I will never achieve.
So perhaps Bertrand was right.
"Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness." ~ Bertrand Russell
What the hell do people want anymore? In this day and age, it seems the search is worth more than the discovery. Everyone is always looking over another's shoulder to see if they can find just a little bit more. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
Where are we going? In a time where it seems satisfaction is unattainable, and contentment is a dread, one must wonder what lies ahead for future generations. Through the advancement of technology and the birth of the age of the internet, so much of the mysteries of life have been revealed and discarded. Who needs to pick up a phone and call someone when you are just one click away from them on FB. I don't even have to define what "FB" means. We all know.
I had a 4 hour telephone conversation with someone this evening. Quite unbelievable, but even further, quite amazing. It's not just the initiation of the event, but one must be able to sustain conversation for that length of time. This is not so unusual when reflecting on times of the past, but in this day and age of convenience, so rarely are we able to sit and connect and "just be" with someone via this medium.
I remember a time when you used to be able to see someone, and there would be an air of mystery to them. Your imagination about said individual could wander wildly, and to even have a few words exchanged with them in person was a gift you would subsequently carry with you for weeks to come. The imagination used to soar. These days, with just a click of a button, you can have 90% of the questions you have about someone answered by examining their FB.
Have we all become a shallow electronic puddle by which we are all fishing from? I paused, rubbed my eyes slowly and deeply, and released a sigh after having typed that sentence. If we are indeed in that puddle, and if we choose to fish in it, do we become electric, then? "Are friends electric?" These are the times we are living in. Through the electric pool we are able to invest less, close doors (windows), and delete our emotions. The online community vs. the community of brother and sisterhood are two very differing realms, and the latter is fading fast.
Some say history repeats itself. In that case, there will eventually be a degeneration that leads us back to square 1 in terms of the way we connect and bond with our fellow beings. I can only hope and wish that by the time that occurs, my generation will be able to remember a time before (and very early during) their own...
...when people communicated without the vice of devices.
Happy New Year. And so it goes. Another year. Days and days will pass yet once again filled with all of our heart's desires. I hope this year proves satisfying for you all.
Today is a new day. A day of renewal. A day to revive lost faiths. A day to turn our heads to wounds of the past. It is a new year.
Nothing is of waste if we have managed to extract some sort of knowledge from it. The good, the bad, the ugly: everything comes bearing gifts.
Let this be your year to stand strong. To be whom you were intended to be. Be cautious. Know your value. Be discriminatory. You are the only YOU. If the people in your life do not see your value, then move along. Paulo Coelho said it best when he wrote, "Eat when it’s time to eat. And move along when it’s time to move along."
Recognize those that love you. Give them your love and your time.
Protect the hearts of those that are near to you.
Beware the joker.
Be kind and gentle to your fellow man.
Know that we all suffer in unity, yet we all are unique in our struggles.
Be patient.
Be kind.
Be honest.
Give love.
Or be the void, but be it quick--
anyone will understand your need to disappear as long as you don't try to deceive.
Goodbye, 2012.
Goodnight, my loves.